Slow
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I'm in my mid fourties now, and I think it's pretty safe to say that I am in the middle of my life, with one half lived and the other, if I'm lucky, still to live. So when I think about taking things slowly, I also always think about how I probaly won't have enough time for that.
Now, this coming from me of all people, the slowest ass ever, is a bit strange. But the fear, or what could become a fear anyway, is real. I am at least at the beginning of the second half of my life, I haven't achieved anything (not really), I have done and experienced very little, and time is running out. That is a bit scary.
And yet I am here, thinking and writing about taking things (more) slowly (again). Maybe these thoughts come automatically with getting older? Maybe as we approach the end of our lives we start to wish for (good) moments to last a little while longer, to move a bit more slowly?
Time and care
The world has been in the mode of "higher, faster, and more of everything" for a while now. I don't know these things, and I can be so wrong about this, but I always think about the starting point for that as the industrial revolution. I imagine (fantasise?) that before machines started to replace manual labour, things were allowed to take the time they needed. To make a dress, a pair of shoes, stockings, saddles, bread, beer, anything simply takes time -- and care. They go hand in hand. If you put care into things, you automatically take time to do so, because doing otherwise would not be careful.
E-mails are letters
A few months ago I received one of the rare e-mail responses to one of my blog posts. The writer closed that e-mail with the wish to keep this conversation going and keep exchanging e-mails. I was delighted. And then I procrastinated on actually replying. It took me about a month (I didn't check) to finally do so. And the other person took their time to reply in turn. We talked about this in these first e-mails. And since we're so slow at replying to each other, it was still a topic in my last e-mail.
I said that taking weeks to reply to an e-mail is like writing letters. Depending on how long they take to get from sender to receiver, it can be weeks between letters. And since we are on pretty much the opposite sides of the planet, that would actually be the case with us!
I don't think that just because e-mails take no time to reach their destination it means we have to reply immediately. It's like with instant messaging: Just because it's instantly delivered does not mean you have to instantly reply. You can if you are able and want to. But you do not have to. I send messages at a time that is convenient to me. And so should you.
I know it can be frustrating when you have to wait though. E.g. I hate that my brother never answers my questions about what to get his kids for their birthdays until a few days before their actual birthdays. But that's a different topic.
In the case of my e-mail exchange the waiting is not frustrating at all. I enjoy that this is a slow thing.
- Elena.
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